God's beaches ...

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to go to the beach for the first time this year. There is something about the beach that escapes my ability to describe it - but let me try. First, of course, there are all the childhood memories of being at the beach with extended family. The sunburns, the great food, playing games, staying up until 5 AM playing video games with my cousins, building sandcastles, sand-cars, and digging deep holes. Finding sand crabs and fishing off the piers. Watching the adults eat dozens of crabs. And, of course, the occasional squabble. Mostly fond memories. That's probably a lot of it - but not all.

I loved the hot sand leading up to the cool, crashing waves. Feeling conflicting thoughts of wanting to go "way out" in the waves and being terrified of sharks. Thinking that every sharp shell or rock was a crab waiting to bite a toe. Jumping up on the face of a wave, reaching the top and having the wave move out from under you so that your whole body is out of the water was the goal for us. We spent hours in the ocean.

Now, I love the way the air smells, the warmth of the sun that somehow is just stronger than the sun we have at home. The way my body feels baking in the sun as the water evaporates, leaving a thin layer of salt over my sunscreen-coated body. I love finding shells. Yesterday, we found one of the best shells I have ever seen recovered from the shore. Mostly, we just find bivalve shells, and rarely intact at that. But this was one of those colorful spiral shells that I only ever found at the shops along the beach. It is a perfect specimen (or at least perfect enough that I won't look for defects and ruin the thought).

But again, I find myself praising Him. When I was a child, these things were good as pleasures unto themselves. But now, they are seen as gifts from a creator who loves his creation and loves us. These things are wonders that speak to his glory, his creativity, his love. The sun very much speaks to his character - life-giving and positively enjoyable to bask in, but come before Him in just your own skin and you will experience burning pain. None of us can stand before the Holy One without the covering of Christ - but from within that covering, we can enjoy the glorious energy that comes from Him.

It's interesting that life has become much more enjoyable lately. There is a depth and a richness to things I was just not aware of previously. Busy-ness - even "religious" busy-ness - really can cause you to miss the forest for the trees ...

Lord, your beaches are truly awe-inspiring. The continuously renewing artwork that is the surf and sky highlights your infinite power, creativity, and care of detail. The warmth of the sun is more satisfying than all the trinkets I have in my house. You let your sun shine and the beaches glow on your enemies as well as your family ... the creatures who live under your care (and under our noses) show your handiwork ... there is no one like You ...

What do you do when someone hurts you?

What do you do when someone hurts you? Not just anyone, but someone close. Not just someone close, but your best friend. Not just hurts you, but strikes you at your core.

I had an experience like that recently. Someone said something to me to struck me down, took my breath away. If you've ever seen the movie "First Knight" with Sean Connery, the scene where Arthur's "dream" dies - that's how I felt and what came to mind for me. It was as if my inspiration was taken away. My dream died. And I was angry.

Now, I simmered for a number of days, not sure what to do, where to go, what to say. But, because of what God has been doing in my life, I was not able to solely camp on the thing done to me. Many things came to mind. First, perhaps God allowed this to take place because I had allowed this relationship to become part of my identity - perhaps to displace or compete with God on His throne in my life. God is my identity alone. Everything else is a blessing from Him, but it's not Him.

Second, I realized that I too have said something similar to this person in the past. Not exactly the same, and it was many years ago, but I suppose it was no less hurtful. And it certainly was no less culpable.

Third, nothing in my life is as good as I thought it was. This is a good realization. Nothing in my life satisfies or lives up to the promises it makes to me. Not baseball, not wrestling, not even theology itself. Nothing except Christ. Christ far outshines the things in my life that I thought were so good. I was content with fool's gold and quartz crystals and "shiny metal trinkets" until I saw true beauty. I was, to borrow a phrase, content with making mud pies in the gutter when a holiday at the sea had been offered. None of the things I thought would satisfy me ever live up to the "billing" they receive in my head.

Only Christ is worthy of worship. Only Christ is worthy of being "on a pedestal" in my life. Only Christ is capable of never letting me down. Only Christ has died for me and lives to make me His own ...

So when someone hurt me, I did not minimize the pain. Instead I remembered my past and what I had done and how Christ forgives me. Things are put in their proper place in my life - if even for only just a moment. I choose to forgive them - which means I relinquish all rights to bring it up again or make them pay for what they did. I thank God for showing me once again that only He truly satisfies. I can enjoy my friend again in Christ - not because they give me what I "need" - but because what I need has been taken care of by Christ.

Theme Parks ...

I have had the opportunity to go to two major theme parks this summer and will be at another one in a month. We also live fairly close to a "second-level" theme park and may go there as well. We've been on the East Coast and the West Coast. In the "somewhat north" and the "somewhat south."

As I reflect on these parks, they really do give experiences that you can get no where else. I don't particularly like riding spinning rides - even the merry-go-rounds make me dizzy - and though I like going fast, I dislike the drops and twists and loops of many roller coasters. I love water rides, though I fear that I will gain more speed than the engineer calculated and go hurtling over the side and become a newspaper headline ... in short, I'm rather boring when it comes to rides - but that's not to say the parks don't try to entice me...

But as I was going on a ride, I began to wonder why it is that we like this adrenaline rush so. Sure, in the moment, your whole body feels "alive" as every nerve screams with some sort of sensation. Is that, though, what we've become? A society that raises nerve impulses to the level of worship? Have we become so calloused to the everyday joys and sorrows of life that we need these "super-experiences" to reach us?

I like going fast. I like feeling the wind on my face, the scenery whizzing by, and the heightened awareness that comes with it. But I can easily fall asleep on a plane traveling 400 miles an hour. So, it's not the raw speed that gets me. Is it the wind? I don't think so. I could probably sit in front of a fan, especially on a hot day, blowing at me at 60 miles an hour and have some fun for a few minutes. So, is it the danger that thrills me? Or the thought of feeling like I'm in control of something powerful?

I don't know. But I know I like theme parks and certain rides. Maybe because they provide unusual experiences. Maybe because they provide a common experience of fun with my fellow humans. Maybe because it tingles those nerve endings. But something still feels wrong.

How empty would life be if that's all we had. No, these experiences are not even the icing on the cake - maybe they're the wax or plastic decorations that adorn certain themes. The real experiences of life - sharing your life with another person, understanding who you truly are and your place in this universe, and ultimately knowing the One True and Living God - these are the things that make life bearable and enjoyable. And these are the things that make eternity conceivable as an everlasting state of happiness. Can you imagine riding Sidewinder for all time? Or "It's a small World?" Or any other ride? Or even every ride known to mankind? Now that would be hell. So what does that make this little small piece we experience now?

Engineer or Poet

Sometimes I feel like there is a rift in the world in general, in me, and in the christian world along the lines of engineers (i.e. science) and poets (i.e. artists). I know others have spoken of similar rifts, so it's not new territory, and the world is not so black and white that we all easily fit into one camp or another. We're not polarized people. In Braveheart, I think the line is used to describe the men who died as "warrior-poets," which may be another way to see a similar grouping. In any case, I know I feel tension between my "thinking" side and my "feeling" side. I'm not sure it has to be that way, but it seems that it just is. It's somewhat like the jock-nerd descriptions used in high school. I was too "nerdy" for many of the jocks, and too "jocky" for many of the nerds - and so I felt like I didn't belong anywhere. Both of the labels were used to keep the other at bay, and it is just another way that we try to make sense of our world - and justify our dislike of those who are different.

But lately, I feel like I have noticed a similar thing in theology. Now, I could be completely wrong in the generalization I'm about to say, but it seems accurate right here and right now. From my experience with dispensational and covenant theology, it seems as if those who tend to be "engineers" like the dispensational system, and those who tend to be "poets" like the covenantal system. The engineers try to make things as "concrete" as possible, as "unbiased" as possible, and as "straightforward" as possible. Sounds good - especially to that part of our culture that virtually worships science. The poets try to look at themes, as figurative language, as beauty within the form itself. This also sounds good to some. At times, the "engineers" give a very "flat" understanding of texts, while at others, the "poets" seem to wipe away all meaning for the sake of form. Without wanting to be pejorative, it seems like the engineers can be awfully close to the Pharisees camp, while the poets camp out near the Sadducees. I'm not sure which is better. It seems that Jesus was tough on both ...

There are truths to be learned from analyzing the world through scientific eyes, through breaking down into parts and classifying. There are truths to be learned through poetic eyes - through looking for grand themes, using colorful language, and through looking at things not-so-ordinarily. But if the Bible is God's Word, it seems that both of these approaches could lead us to wrong understanding at times. There are certainly parts of the Bible where "it means exactly what the plain, ordinary, non-contextual language says." But it seems that there are other parts which are figurative ways to communicate deep truths. The truth is still real and there, but one must "work at it" to find it.

I don't know. I do feel confused at times. I am appalled at how quickly each side will cast the other in the worst light possible. Could it be that we have not progressed enough to arrive at a system that truly reflects all biblical truths?

"Good Works ..."

I have put together some thoughts concerning “good works.” To me, this was a confusing part of what it means to be a Christian for many years. Perhaps these will help some who may have similar struggles. Now, I’m not a fan of ripping verses away from their context, so let me urge you to take the time to consider scripture for yourself.

I think to start, you have to remember both the “comfort” and the “call” of the gospel. The “comfort” is the basis for everything because without it, you will stand self-condemned (and really condemned) if you try to stand before God on the basis of what you do (or don’t do). We can stand before God with no fear of His Holy wrath only because of what Christ has done for us. There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus! When you “mess up” – and you will – you are not rejected, scorned or subjected to wrath. You are loved as a child, a beloved child, whose Father wants only the best for them. He has done what is necessary to restore the relationship with you. The penalty is paid.

Yet, because you are his child, and because he loves you, you will not be left where you are. God will take you where he has promised – he who has begun the good work in you will be faithful to complete it in you. Discipline – in contrast to punishment – is part of this loving process. God does not “repay His children” according to what they have done. Christ bore our punishment, and we are given credit for his righteousness. He disciplines us, not to make up for the wrong we did, but to conform us more to the likeness of Christ. And, as his children, we will begin to resemble him. The call of the gospel is the call to a life, a journey, a race … that is different than what “everyone else” goes through. God works in us to bring about these changes through his spirit. Paul tells us that we are in a race, and that like athletes, we run with a purpose. We are told that Paul struggles with “all His energy” to present people spotless. There is a struggle, and it does take effort. But we are not left to our own resources. We are to work out our salvation with fear and trembling – for it is God who works with us! This is not a matter of running to be saved. We are saved, and then entered in the race.

I have a friend who used one of my past experiences to explain this. My high school wrestling coach was tough. He was harsh. He was talented. If he thought you had talent to go far, he would work with you for hours on end. But if you were just so-so – and especially if you didn’t put the 110% effort in he wanted, he had no time for you. My junior year, we were ranked 12th in the state. Now, there were 12 varsity positions, 12 JV positions, and 12 freshman positions available. I believe we had about 16 kids out – total. We had a ridiculously small team (compared to our ranking) because you were either really good – and one of his favorites – or he would ride you until you quit. My friend put it this way: To be on Mr. Jones’ (not his real name) team, you already have to be good. To be on God’s team, you just have to “participate” – He will make you good. That hit home for me. This is not about living up to some standard in order to be let on God’s team. God knows you’re not good enough. But like all great coaches, he will invest in you to make you become not just the best you can be – for that depends on you – but will pour himself in you so that you can become far more than your abilities, background, and efforts will produce. You will become not merely a “good sinner” but instead will partake of the divine nature in a way that we do not fully understand (not that we become God) – for “when we see Him, we will be like Him.” So, having said all that, here we go.

God is concerned with the inner reality of you, not just your performance. He values humility, brokenness, and neediness. He cares about you – you are not just a cog in a machine. He knows you by name – he even numbers the hairs on your head. This life is not our home, and not the final chapter of our story. Our good works will cause others to praise Him, not us. Our life before God does not just consist of “not doing bad things,” but dealing with the motives, desires, and thoughts that are behind them. Our life does not just consist of “doing good things,” either, for the motives, desires, and thoughts behind them are also laid bare before our God. It is not enough to “look good on the outside” – for Jesus called the Pharisees (the most religious people around) “whitewashed tombs full of dead men’s bones.”
We are not made right with God by our works. No work of ours can ever be pure enough to withstand the judging gaze of a Holy God. But, like Abraham, if we believe God – if we take Him at His word – Christ’s righteousness is given to us and our punishment is taken by Him so that there is no more fear before our loving Father. Our gifts from God are not wages of an obedient servant, but are pure manifestations of his grace to us. We deserve nothing good from Him, yet He lavishes His grace and love on us. We have all heavenly blessings in Him.

Our religious service to God is empty if we do not seek to restore our relationships. When we do our “religious” service (i.e. give to the needy, pray, fast, etc.), do not do it to be seen before men – do it quietly, even secretly, so that only God knows it. Test your motives and consider why you do what you do.

Do not pray mindlessly or try to manipulate God through many words – recognize that He is our Father, who knows what we need before we ask of Him, and that he desires our best, even when we do not recognize what that is. Prayer is not a ritual to be checked off on our list of spiritual duties, but is, in fact, part of our communication with our Father who loves us and has done everything needed to restore and have a relationship with us. Seek him, ask him for your heart’s desire, but recognize you are not trying to persuade an unwilling, uncaring, absent, or mean Father – but one that loves you far too much to give you trinkets when there is everlasting joy to be had. You may even find that over time, your heart begins to resemble his, and therefore your prayers will reflect his loving will in your life – and perhaps he won’t have to lovingly say “no” so often …

Do not think more highly of yourself than you ought, and do not become proud. Don’t allow yourself to be convinced that your “good works” give you any standing before God – it is Christ, and Christ alone who provides the covering for you to stand before a Holy God and not be wiped away.
Doing “good” to others is not to be considered opposing “religious duty” – if your donkey falls in a pit, lift him out – and if you can relieve the suffering of another, do so – even if it means you get your church clothes dirty. Though the poor will always be with us, and one person or family cannot put right all wrongs, don’t let that stop you from getting involved. Relieve suffering, help those in need – become an answer to someone’s prayer. Give joyfully – rejoice that the Lord has entrusted some of his riches to you so that you might experience the joy of helping another. Let your gifts show the overflowing of God’s love being super-abundantly poured into your heart – expecting nothing in return. And rejoice when you are scorned for it.

Don’t take God’s patience with you for granted. It does not last forever, although he is long suffering. Make sure that you are right with Him, that you know Him, and that He knows you. We no longer serve our flesh, but serve God in the Spirit. Take your life seriously.

Consider the life you have before you. No one knows if you have one day or 50 years left. But it can be poured out for God like a drink offering. Don’t just go with the flow. Consider the choices you can make starting now. Store up for yourself treasures in heaven. Use your material blessing, as the shrewd manager, to “gain” eternal thankfulness from those who will be your brother and sister forever. Make sure that your family, your neighbors, and your place of influence would miss you if you died tomorrow. Let your impact be one that will cause them to praise God at the Last Day when all is revealed – even if they never praised God before.

Let us be people who are not tossed about by our circumstances. Let us not complain, argue, mutter, nurse our anger and hurts, or allow things to fester. Let us be people of integrity, living a life worthy of the calling we have received. Let us be more concerned with the filthy or salty water that flows from the spring of our own hearts than with correcting others. Let us speak humbly, gently, and truthfully to others when we do speak, waiting to listen more than speak.

Let us give thanks constantly to God, becoming ever more aware of his constant provision for us. Let us turn our hearts from the things that so easily ensnare us and allow our hearts to be captured by the Glory of the Lord. Let us endure with much patience and joy – knowing that our Father sees everything and will one day right all wrongs on that Great and Dreadful Day. Rejoice that He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into His family – into the Kingdom of light. Rejoice that your sins are forgiven!

Don’t become impressed with human regulations that seek to regulate mere external behavior (i.e. don’t touch! Don’t taste!). Recognize that such rules do not get at the heart of the matter – our hearts. Avoidance of situations, while wise when we are weak, is not the same as defeating them in battle through the strength of God. Recognize that nothing outside of ourselves defiles us, and we do not protect the hearts of our loved ones by sheer removal of temptation. Monasteries were not the answer to the human problem of sin, for no matter how isolated they were, there was always at least one sinful heart in any situation! The problem is not external to us, but internal. To be sure, external things can influence us – but the real problem is always within our own hearts.

Consider that Paul told Timothy to teach others that godliness is not a matter of externals - though sometimes they can be an expression of what is going on internally (i.e. braided hair and pearls in their culture) - but of matters of the heart and the actions that flow from it. Good works include things like caring for your own family, caring for your parents and grandparents, bringing up children, showing hospitality, helping those in trouble, and so forth. These are not the “big things” we sometimes associate with serving God – but are the little things in daily life that are an expression of true faith. He says to avoid the evil desires of youth, avoid foolish and stupid arguments, avoid quarrels, and pursue instead righteousness, faith, love, peace, kindness, gentleness, and cleanse yourself from the “clay” of this world.

Paul tells Titus that godliness involves self-control, being worthy of respect, sound in faith, in love and in endurance. We should not be slanderers or drunkards, but reverent in the way we live. We are called to love our spouses and children, to be pure, to be kind, and subject to authorities (i.e. not rebellious). As God’s children, we should have integrity, be serious and not flippant, and have our speech be sound. To be hard-working (yet not workaholics), peaceable and considerate. To slander no one and show true humility, not being divisive. We are not to be idle – and if someone will not work, let him also not eat.

James concentrates on the tongue being a sign of our “religion.” Our tongue issues forth from our hearts – whatever is in our heart will eventually flow from the tongue – no one can fully “tame” the tongue. He also points to looking after orphans and widows – the most helpless in society – as part of our service to God. As is keeping oneself from being polluted by the world. We are to do “our deeds” in the humility that comes from wisdom. Don’t boast about your sin, nor deny the truth of it. Watch out for envy and selfish ambition, for their you find disorder and every evil practice. Characteristics of “heavenly wisdom” is that it is pure, peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

The last verses I picked out were from Peter, where he urges us to live as aliens and strangers in the world – abstaining from sinful desires, and living in such a way that the pagans will glorify God because of your good deeds. That is a good reminder that it’s not so that we have a relationship with God, but our good works are to His Glory for taking creatures such as we are and changing us into the likeness of His Son!

Before you read through the verses themselves, let me say that I’m sure there are verses I did not include that could have been, but I hope I have been faithful to the flavor of scripture. In many ways, the list of things God calls us to is far simpler than we sometimes think or hear. You really can sum it all up with “loving God” and “loving others” – as long as you have a biblical picture of love. A little more specifically – don’t play the religion game, God is concerned with your internal life before Him, and how that plays out into your external life with others. Looking even closer – helping family members (parents, grandparents), orphans, widows, people in need, raising children, and those in need around us pleases the Lord. Avoiding conflict not by denying its existence, but by addressing the issues in our own hearts before the Lord pleases Him. To grow in resemblance of Him pleases Him. The list could go on, but I think it is significant to look at the fact that these things are not “climbing the highest mountain” for God, or vowing to never speak again in reverence to God, but are truly the everyday things of life. Very few, if any, of these things require any training whatsoever to understand. They are accessible to the lowliest peasant to the highest king. And yet, they are truly impossible to change on our own. They are so simple – but they go to our core. And, we know our core is rotten. It is only as God renews our hearts, resuscitates us, and revitalizes us that we begin to have a new core. And, as God deals with us in our core, it is reborn and grows in likeness to Him. These simple things are the really tough battles of life because we are there constantly. My fear, my agenda, my anger, my desire to be in control, and my pride are always with me. And that is why the battle is so hard and so long. Praise God that He does it in us - for there is no hope in ourselves. God’s desires for us are wonderfully simple. We need not be scholars or strong men or “super” in any area to understand what he calls us to. But we must forsake of any merit, any deserving, before God based on our efforts.

Loving God. Loving others. So simple – yet horrifyingly difficult if we were left to ourselves. God first loved us, and that is why we can run this race in his power …

How do you know when a dream dies?

There are things going on in my life at the moment that make me wonder if I have put too much hope in certain things coming to pass. It's a bit like when I woke up one day and realized I would never be a major league baseball player. It may be the only dream I have held as far back as I can remember. I remember all those hours from fourth grade on that I spent watching games. The 1980 season is, of course, the highlight for any Phillie fan who was alive to see it. Schmidt, Carlton, Rose, Boone, Trillo, Bowa, Maddox, McBride, Luzinski, McGraw - those names are frozen in my mind as to "who should be playing." I loved Kruk and the 1993 Phillies, and the current Phillies are gaining my "trust" - in spite of the lack of starting pitching. There was a time in my life where I at, slept, and drank baseball during the spring, summer, and fall.

I played little league baseball, but I was not great. Due to a congenital defect and an early operation, I have limited depth perception - so I had a disadvantage batting before I ever started. My build was more conducive to football and wrestling as well. Because of my eyes, I could not play outfield well, either. Through the years, I played second base, third base, and catcher. I played JV baseball one year, and had the opportunity to pitch, but that was a disaster - my ERA was 162.00! But I loved baseball. My dream, as many boys my age was to play for the Phillies.

I remember the shock when the first person younger than me appeared on a baseball card. It was a realization that I would not be drafted and have a long career in the majors. But there was still a young man's hope that somehow, someday I would "be discovered" and shoot to the majors in a flash. Over the years, the hope dimmed but still flickered. Once the majority of players on the Phillies roster was older than I was, though, the dream fell on hard times. Then I had to look hard to find anyone younger than I ... and the dream died.

But really, what was my dream about? Sure, I love baseball - I hope there is baseball in heaven, though I'm not sure how a glorified pitcher and a glorified batter face each other ... but was my dream about fame? fortune? pleasure? Maybe all these and more? I don't really know. I do feel at times jealous of the skill the players have - wondering what it would be like to be able to get the winning hit or the game-saving play. But I have other gifts that perhaps many of them wish they had. And my family is currently healthy, whole, and blessed. Why is it that my heart undervalues what I have for what I think I want that others have? Why do I still chase after the dream? Why isn't my heart in tune with the Lord? He made me and knows my gifts and shortcomings, my desires and dislikes, and the things I invest in and the things I let slip. He is guiding my life to take me exactly where he wants me to go - where I need to go - to be the person I need to be.

My dream should not be about the temporary and fleeting career of a ballplayer. My dream should not be about money or fortune or even the joy of playing baseball. These things are incidental to what I was created to do. I was created to enjoy God, to bask in His radiance, to use the gifts and abilities He has given me for His Glory, for His Kingdom, and for others. Even if no one knows my nae outside of my little circle of family or friends, that's OK - the King of the universe knows my name and is taking me to be with Him. Forever. And that's a dream - a reality - worth investing in...