God's beaches ...

Yesterday, I had the opportunity to go to the beach for the first time this year. There is something about the beach that escapes my ability to describe it - but let me try. First, of course, there are all the childhood memories of being at the beach with extended family. The sunburns, the great food, playing games, staying up until 5 AM playing video games with my cousins, building sandcastles, sand-cars, and digging deep holes. Finding sand crabs and fishing off the piers. Watching the adults eat dozens of crabs. And, of course, the occasional squabble. Mostly fond memories. That's probably a lot of it - but not all.

I loved the hot sand leading up to the cool, crashing waves. Feeling conflicting thoughts of wanting to go "way out" in the waves and being terrified of sharks. Thinking that every sharp shell or rock was a crab waiting to bite a toe. Jumping up on the face of a wave, reaching the top and having the wave move out from under you so that your whole body is out of the water was the goal for us. We spent hours in the ocean.

Now, I love the way the air smells, the warmth of the sun that somehow is just stronger than the sun we have at home. The way my body feels baking in the sun as the water evaporates, leaving a thin layer of salt over my sunscreen-coated body. I love finding shells. Yesterday, we found one of the best shells I have ever seen recovered from the shore. Mostly, we just find bivalve shells, and rarely intact at that. But this was one of those colorful spiral shells that I only ever found at the shops along the beach. It is a perfect specimen (or at least perfect enough that I won't look for defects and ruin the thought).

But again, I find myself praising Him. When I was a child, these things were good as pleasures unto themselves. But now, they are seen as gifts from a creator who loves his creation and loves us. These things are wonders that speak to his glory, his creativity, his love. The sun very much speaks to his character - life-giving and positively enjoyable to bask in, but come before Him in just your own skin and you will experience burning pain. None of us can stand before the Holy One without the covering of Christ - but from within that covering, we can enjoy the glorious energy that comes from Him.

It's interesting that life has become much more enjoyable lately. There is a depth and a richness to things I was just not aware of previously. Busy-ness - even "religious" busy-ness - really can cause you to miss the forest for the trees ...

Lord, your beaches are truly awe-inspiring. The continuously renewing artwork that is the surf and sky highlights your infinite power, creativity, and care of detail. The warmth of the sun is more satisfying than all the trinkets I have in my house. You let your sun shine and the beaches glow on your enemies as well as your family ... the creatures who live under your care (and under our noses) show your handiwork ... there is no one like You ...

What do you do when someone hurts you?

What do you do when someone hurts you? Not just anyone, but someone close. Not just someone close, but your best friend. Not just hurts you, but strikes you at your core.

I had an experience like that recently. Someone said something to me to struck me down, took my breath away. If you've ever seen the movie "First Knight" with Sean Connery, the scene where Arthur's "dream" dies - that's how I felt and what came to mind for me. It was as if my inspiration was taken away. My dream died. And I was angry.

Now, I simmered for a number of days, not sure what to do, where to go, what to say. But, because of what God has been doing in my life, I was not able to solely camp on the thing done to me. Many things came to mind. First, perhaps God allowed this to take place because I had allowed this relationship to become part of my identity - perhaps to displace or compete with God on His throne in my life. God is my identity alone. Everything else is a blessing from Him, but it's not Him.

Second, I realized that I too have said something similar to this person in the past. Not exactly the same, and it was many years ago, but I suppose it was no less hurtful. And it certainly was no less culpable.

Third, nothing in my life is as good as I thought it was. This is a good realization. Nothing in my life satisfies or lives up to the promises it makes to me. Not baseball, not wrestling, not even theology itself. Nothing except Christ. Christ far outshines the things in my life that I thought were so good. I was content with fool's gold and quartz crystals and "shiny metal trinkets" until I saw true beauty. I was, to borrow a phrase, content with making mud pies in the gutter when a holiday at the sea had been offered. None of the things I thought would satisfy me ever live up to the "billing" they receive in my head.

Only Christ is worthy of worship. Only Christ is worthy of being "on a pedestal" in my life. Only Christ is capable of never letting me down. Only Christ has died for me and lives to make me His own ...

So when someone hurt me, I did not minimize the pain. Instead I remembered my past and what I had done and how Christ forgives me. Things are put in their proper place in my life - if even for only just a moment. I choose to forgive them - which means I relinquish all rights to bring it up again or make them pay for what they did. I thank God for showing me once again that only He truly satisfies. I can enjoy my friend again in Christ - not because they give me what I "need" - but because what I need has been taken care of by Christ.

Theme Parks ...

I have had the opportunity to go to two major theme parks this summer and will be at another one in a month. We also live fairly close to a "second-level" theme park and may go there as well. We've been on the East Coast and the West Coast. In the "somewhat north" and the "somewhat south."

As I reflect on these parks, they really do give experiences that you can get no where else. I don't particularly like riding spinning rides - even the merry-go-rounds make me dizzy - and though I like going fast, I dislike the drops and twists and loops of many roller coasters. I love water rides, though I fear that I will gain more speed than the engineer calculated and go hurtling over the side and become a newspaper headline ... in short, I'm rather boring when it comes to rides - but that's not to say the parks don't try to entice me...

But as I was going on a ride, I began to wonder why it is that we like this adrenaline rush so. Sure, in the moment, your whole body feels "alive" as every nerve screams with some sort of sensation. Is that, though, what we've become? A society that raises nerve impulses to the level of worship? Have we become so calloused to the everyday joys and sorrows of life that we need these "super-experiences" to reach us?

I like going fast. I like feeling the wind on my face, the scenery whizzing by, and the heightened awareness that comes with it. But I can easily fall asleep on a plane traveling 400 miles an hour. So, it's not the raw speed that gets me. Is it the wind? I don't think so. I could probably sit in front of a fan, especially on a hot day, blowing at me at 60 miles an hour and have some fun for a few minutes. So, is it the danger that thrills me? Or the thought of feeling like I'm in control of something powerful?

I don't know. But I know I like theme parks and certain rides. Maybe because they provide unusual experiences. Maybe because they provide a common experience of fun with my fellow humans. Maybe because it tingles those nerve endings. But something still feels wrong.

How empty would life be if that's all we had. No, these experiences are not even the icing on the cake - maybe they're the wax or plastic decorations that adorn certain themes. The real experiences of life - sharing your life with another person, understanding who you truly are and your place in this universe, and ultimately knowing the One True and Living God - these are the things that make life bearable and enjoyable. And these are the things that make eternity conceivable as an everlasting state of happiness. Can you imagine riding Sidewinder for all time? Or "It's a small World?" Or any other ride? Or even every ride known to mankind? Now that would be hell. So what does that make this little small piece we experience now?

Engineer or Poet

Sometimes I feel like there is a rift in the world in general, in me, and in the christian world along the lines of engineers (i.e. science) and poets (i.e. artists). I know others have spoken of similar rifts, so it's not new territory, and the world is not so black and white that we all easily fit into one camp or another. We're not polarized people. In Braveheart, I think the line is used to describe the men who died as "warrior-poets," which may be another way to see a similar grouping. In any case, I know I feel tension between my "thinking" side and my "feeling" side. I'm not sure it has to be that way, but it seems that it just is. It's somewhat like the jock-nerd descriptions used in high school. I was too "nerdy" for many of the jocks, and too "jocky" for many of the nerds - and so I felt like I didn't belong anywhere. Both of the labels were used to keep the other at bay, and it is just another way that we try to make sense of our world - and justify our dislike of those who are different.

But lately, I feel like I have noticed a similar thing in theology. Now, I could be completely wrong in the generalization I'm about to say, but it seems accurate right here and right now. From my experience with dispensational and covenant theology, it seems as if those who tend to be "engineers" like the dispensational system, and those who tend to be "poets" like the covenantal system. The engineers try to make things as "concrete" as possible, as "unbiased" as possible, and as "straightforward" as possible. Sounds good - especially to that part of our culture that virtually worships science. The poets try to look at themes, as figurative language, as beauty within the form itself. This also sounds good to some. At times, the "engineers" give a very "flat" understanding of texts, while at others, the "poets" seem to wipe away all meaning for the sake of form. Without wanting to be pejorative, it seems like the engineers can be awfully close to the Pharisees camp, while the poets camp out near the Sadducees. I'm not sure which is better. It seems that Jesus was tough on both ...

There are truths to be learned from analyzing the world through scientific eyes, through breaking down into parts and classifying. There are truths to be learned through poetic eyes - through looking for grand themes, using colorful language, and through looking at things not-so-ordinarily. But if the Bible is God's Word, it seems that both of these approaches could lead us to wrong understanding at times. There are certainly parts of the Bible where "it means exactly what the plain, ordinary, non-contextual language says." But it seems that there are other parts which are figurative ways to communicate deep truths. The truth is still real and there, but one must "work at it" to find it.

I don't know. I do feel confused at times. I am appalled at how quickly each side will cast the other in the worst light possible. Could it be that we have not progressed enough to arrive at a system that truly reflects all biblical truths?

"Good Works ..."

I have put together some thoughts concerning “good works.” To me, this was a confusing part of what it means to be a Christian for many years. Perhaps these will help some who may have similar struggles. Now, I’m not a fan of ripping verses away from their context, so let me urge you to take the time to consider scripture for yourself.

I think to start, you have to remember both the “comfort” and the “call” of the gospel. The “comfort” is the basis for everything because without it, you will stand self-condemned (and really condemned) if you try to stand before God on the basis of what you do (or don’t do). We can stand before God with no fear of His Holy wrath only because of what Christ has done for us. There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus! When you “mess up” – and you will – you are not rejected, scorned or subjected to wrath. You are loved as a child, a beloved child, whose Father wants only the best for them. He has done what is necessary to restore the relationship with you. The penalty is paid.

Yet, because you are his child, and because he loves you, you will not be left where you are. God will take you where he has promised – he who has begun the good work in you will be faithful to complete it in you. Discipline – in contrast to punishment – is part of this loving process. God does not “repay His children” according to what they have done. Christ bore our punishment, and we are given credit for his righteousness. He disciplines us, not to make up for the wrong we did, but to conform us more to the likeness of Christ. And, as his children, we will begin to resemble him. The call of the gospel is the call to a life, a journey, a race … that is different than what “everyone else” goes through. God works in us to bring about these changes through his spirit. Paul tells us that we are in a race, and that like athletes, we run with a purpose. We are told that Paul struggles with “all His energy” to present people spotless. There is a struggle, and it does take effort. But we are not left to our own resources. We are to work out our salvation with fear and trembling – for it is God who works with us! This is not a matter of running to be saved. We are saved, and then entered in the race.

I have a friend who used one of my past experiences to explain this. My high school wrestling coach was tough. He was harsh. He was talented. If he thought you had talent to go far, he would work with you for hours on end. But if you were just so-so – and especially if you didn’t put the 110% effort in he wanted, he had no time for you. My junior year, we were ranked 12th in the state. Now, there were 12 varsity positions, 12 JV positions, and 12 freshman positions available. I believe we had about 16 kids out – total. We had a ridiculously small team (compared to our ranking) because you were either really good – and one of his favorites – or he would ride you until you quit. My friend put it this way: To be on Mr. Jones’ (not his real name) team, you already have to be good. To be on God’s team, you just have to “participate” – He will make you good. That hit home for me. This is not about living up to some standard in order to be let on God’s team. God knows you’re not good enough. But like all great coaches, he will invest in you to make you become not just the best you can be – for that depends on you – but will pour himself in you so that you can become far more than your abilities, background, and efforts will produce. You will become not merely a “good sinner” but instead will partake of the divine nature in a way that we do not fully understand (not that we become God) – for “when we see Him, we will be like Him.” So, having said all that, here we go.

God is concerned with the inner reality of you, not just your performance. He values humility, brokenness, and neediness. He cares about you – you are not just a cog in a machine. He knows you by name – he even numbers the hairs on your head. This life is not our home, and not the final chapter of our story. Our good works will cause others to praise Him, not us. Our life before God does not just consist of “not doing bad things,” but dealing with the motives, desires, and thoughts that are behind them. Our life does not just consist of “doing good things,” either, for the motives, desires, and thoughts behind them are also laid bare before our God. It is not enough to “look good on the outside” – for Jesus called the Pharisees (the most religious people around) “whitewashed tombs full of dead men’s bones.”
We are not made right with God by our works. No work of ours can ever be pure enough to withstand the judging gaze of a Holy God. But, like Abraham, if we believe God – if we take Him at His word – Christ’s righteousness is given to us and our punishment is taken by Him so that there is no more fear before our loving Father. Our gifts from God are not wages of an obedient servant, but are pure manifestations of his grace to us. We deserve nothing good from Him, yet He lavishes His grace and love on us. We have all heavenly blessings in Him.

Our religious service to God is empty if we do not seek to restore our relationships. When we do our “religious” service (i.e. give to the needy, pray, fast, etc.), do not do it to be seen before men – do it quietly, even secretly, so that only God knows it. Test your motives and consider why you do what you do.

Do not pray mindlessly or try to manipulate God through many words – recognize that He is our Father, who knows what we need before we ask of Him, and that he desires our best, even when we do not recognize what that is. Prayer is not a ritual to be checked off on our list of spiritual duties, but is, in fact, part of our communication with our Father who loves us and has done everything needed to restore and have a relationship with us. Seek him, ask him for your heart’s desire, but recognize you are not trying to persuade an unwilling, uncaring, absent, or mean Father – but one that loves you far too much to give you trinkets when there is everlasting joy to be had. You may even find that over time, your heart begins to resemble his, and therefore your prayers will reflect his loving will in your life – and perhaps he won’t have to lovingly say “no” so often …

Do not think more highly of yourself than you ought, and do not become proud. Don’t allow yourself to be convinced that your “good works” give you any standing before God – it is Christ, and Christ alone who provides the covering for you to stand before a Holy God and not be wiped away.
Doing “good” to others is not to be considered opposing “religious duty” – if your donkey falls in a pit, lift him out – and if you can relieve the suffering of another, do so – even if it means you get your church clothes dirty. Though the poor will always be with us, and one person or family cannot put right all wrongs, don’t let that stop you from getting involved. Relieve suffering, help those in need – become an answer to someone’s prayer. Give joyfully – rejoice that the Lord has entrusted some of his riches to you so that you might experience the joy of helping another. Let your gifts show the overflowing of God’s love being super-abundantly poured into your heart – expecting nothing in return. And rejoice when you are scorned for it.

Don’t take God’s patience with you for granted. It does not last forever, although he is long suffering. Make sure that you are right with Him, that you know Him, and that He knows you. We no longer serve our flesh, but serve God in the Spirit. Take your life seriously.

Consider the life you have before you. No one knows if you have one day or 50 years left. But it can be poured out for God like a drink offering. Don’t just go with the flow. Consider the choices you can make starting now. Store up for yourself treasures in heaven. Use your material blessing, as the shrewd manager, to “gain” eternal thankfulness from those who will be your brother and sister forever. Make sure that your family, your neighbors, and your place of influence would miss you if you died tomorrow. Let your impact be one that will cause them to praise God at the Last Day when all is revealed – even if they never praised God before.

Let us be people who are not tossed about by our circumstances. Let us not complain, argue, mutter, nurse our anger and hurts, or allow things to fester. Let us be people of integrity, living a life worthy of the calling we have received. Let us be more concerned with the filthy or salty water that flows from the spring of our own hearts than with correcting others. Let us speak humbly, gently, and truthfully to others when we do speak, waiting to listen more than speak.

Let us give thanks constantly to God, becoming ever more aware of his constant provision for us. Let us turn our hearts from the things that so easily ensnare us and allow our hearts to be captured by the Glory of the Lord. Let us endure with much patience and joy – knowing that our Father sees everything and will one day right all wrongs on that Great and Dreadful Day. Rejoice that He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into His family – into the Kingdom of light. Rejoice that your sins are forgiven!

Don’t become impressed with human regulations that seek to regulate mere external behavior (i.e. don’t touch! Don’t taste!). Recognize that such rules do not get at the heart of the matter – our hearts. Avoidance of situations, while wise when we are weak, is not the same as defeating them in battle through the strength of God. Recognize that nothing outside of ourselves defiles us, and we do not protect the hearts of our loved ones by sheer removal of temptation. Monasteries were not the answer to the human problem of sin, for no matter how isolated they were, there was always at least one sinful heart in any situation! The problem is not external to us, but internal. To be sure, external things can influence us – but the real problem is always within our own hearts.

Consider that Paul told Timothy to teach others that godliness is not a matter of externals - though sometimes they can be an expression of what is going on internally (i.e. braided hair and pearls in their culture) - but of matters of the heart and the actions that flow from it. Good works include things like caring for your own family, caring for your parents and grandparents, bringing up children, showing hospitality, helping those in trouble, and so forth. These are not the “big things” we sometimes associate with serving God – but are the little things in daily life that are an expression of true faith. He says to avoid the evil desires of youth, avoid foolish and stupid arguments, avoid quarrels, and pursue instead righteousness, faith, love, peace, kindness, gentleness, and cleanse yourself from the “clay” of this world.

Paul tells Titus that godliness involves self-control, being worthy of respect, sound in faith, in love and in endurance. We should not be slanderers or drunkards, but reverent in the way we live. We are called to love our spouses and children, to be pure, to be kind, and subject to authorities (i.e. not rebellious). As God’s children, we should have integrity, be serious and not flippant, and have our speech be sound. To be hard-working (yet not workaholics), peaceable and considerate. To slander no one and show true humility, not being divisive. We are not to be idle – and if someone will not work, let him also not eat.

James concentrates on the tongue being a sign of our “religion.” Our tongue issues forth from our hearts – whatever is in our heart will eventually flow from the tongue – no one can fully “tame” the tongue. He also points to looking after orphans and widows – the most helpless in society – as part of our service to God. As is keeping oneself from being polluted by the world. We are to do “our deeds” in the humility that comes from wisdom. Don’t boast about your sin, nor deny the truth of it. Watch out for envy and selfish ambition, for their you find disorder and every evil practice. Characteristics of “heavenly wisdom” is that it is pure, peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

The last verses I picked out were from Peter, where he urges us to live as aliens and strangers in the world – abstaining from sinful desires, and living in such a way that the pagans will glorify God because of your good deeds. That is a good reminder that it’s not so that we have a relationship with God, but our good works are to His Glory for taking creatures such as we are and changing us into the likeness of His Son!

Before you read through the verses themselves, let me say that I’m sure there are verses I did not include that could have been, but I hope I have been faithful to the flavor of scripture. In many ways, the list of things God calls us to is far simpler than we sometimes think or hear. You really can sum it all up with “loving God” and “loving others” – as long as you have a biblical picture of love. A little more specifically – don’t play the religion game, God is concerned with your internal life before Him, and how that plays out into your external life with others. Looking even closer – helping family members (parents, grandparents), orphans, widows, people in need, raising children, and those in need around us pleases the Lord. Avoiding conflict not by denying its existence, but by addressing the issues in our own hearts before the Lord pleases Him. To grow in resemblance of Him pleases Him. The list could go on, but I think it is significant to look at the fact that these things are not “climbing the highest mountain” for God, or vowing to never speak again in reverence to God, but are truly the everyday things of life. Very few, if any, of these things require any training whatsoever to understand. They are accessible to the lowliest peasant to the highest king. And yet, they are truly impossible to change on our own. They are so simple – but they go to our core. And, we know our core is rotten. It is only as God renews our hearts, resuscitates us, and revitalizes us that we begin to have a new core. And, as God deals with us in our core, it is reborn and grows in likeness to Him. These simple things are the really tough battles of life because we are there constantly. My fear, my agenda, my anger, my desire to be in control, and my pride are always with me. And that is why the battle is so hard and so long. Praise God that He does it in us - for there is no hope in ourselves. God’s desires for us are wonderfully simple. We need not be scholars or strong men or “super” in any area to understand what he calls us to. But we must forsake of any merit, any deserving, before God based on our efforts.

Loving God. Loving others. So simple – yet horrifyingly difficult if we were left to ourselves. God first loved us, and that is why we can run this race in his power …

How do you know when a dream dies?

There are things going on in my life at the moment that make me wonder if I have put too much hope in certain things coming to pass. It's a bit like when I woke up one day and realized I would never be a major league baseball player. It may be the only dream I have held as far back as I can remember. I remember all those hours from fourth grade on that I spent watching games. The 1980 season is, of course, the highlight for any Phillie fan who was alive to see it. Schmidt, Carlton, Rose, Boone, Trillo, Bowa, Maddox, McBride, Luzinski, McGraw - those names are frozen in my mind as to "who should be playing." I loved Kruk and the 1993 Phillies, and the current Phillies are gaining my "trust" - in spite of the lack of starting pitching. There was a time in my life where I at, slept, and drank baseball during the spring, summer, and fall.

I played little league baseball, but I was not great. Due to a congenital defect and an early operation, I have limited depth perception - so I had a disadvantage batting before I ever started. My build was more conducive to football and wrestling as well. Because of my eyes, I could not play outfield well, either. Through the years, I played second base, third base, and catcher. I played JV baseball one year, and had the opportunity to pitch, but that was a disaster - my ERA was 162.00! But I loved baseball. My dream, as many boys my age was to play for the Phillies.

I remember the shock when the first person younger than me appeared on a baseball card. It was a realization that I would not be drafted and have a long career in the majors. But there was still a young man's hope that somehow, someday I would "be discovered" and shoot to the majors in a flash. Over the years, the hope dimmed but still flickered. Once the majority of players on the Phillies roster was older than I was, though, the dream fell on hard times. Then I had to look hard to find anyone younger than I ... and the dream died.

But really, what was my dream about? Sure, I love baseball - I hope there is baseball in heaven, though I'm not sure how a glorified pitcher and a glorified batter face each other ... but was my dream about fame? fortune? pleasure? Maybe all these and more? I don't really know. I do feel at times jealous of the skill the players have - wondering what it would be like to be able to get the winning hit or the game-saving play. But I have other gifts that perhaps many of them wish they had. And my family is currently healthy, whole, and blessed. Why is it that my heart undervalues what I have for what I think I want that others have? Why do I still chase after the dream? Why isn't my heart in tune with the Lord? He made me and knows my gifts and shortcomings, my desires and dislikes, and the things I invest in and the things I let slip. He is guiding my life to take me exactly where he wants me to go - where I need to go - to be the person I need to be.

My dream should not be about the temporary and fleeting career of a ballplayer. My dream should not be about money or fortune or even the joy of playing baseball. These things are incidental to what I was created to do. I was created to enjoy God, to bask in His radiance, to use the gifts and abilities He has given me for His Glory, for His Kingdom, and for others. Even if no one knows my nae outside of my little circle of family or friends, that's OK - the King of the universe knows my name and is taking me to be with Him. Forever. And that's a dream - a reality - worth investing in...

Lowering the standard for legalists

Once again, my perfectionistic mindset has wreaked havoc on my day. How can I possibly have God's favor when I keep committing the same sins over and over? There are times when I feel so strong, and other when I feel so weak. I've read enough from other people to realize that I probably have it backwards - when I feel strong, I'm probably most vulnerable. It just seems that I trip so easily on things when I feel weak. I guess it's really not right to say I feel weak. I don't feel anything in particular - except the desire I want to fulfill. It's only afterwards that the shame comes. But I trust the Lord when he says that when we ask forgiveness, he is faithful and true for His name's sake. And I marvel again ...

But I was thinking about my long history of perfectionism and legalism and wondered why it has such a strong hold on me. I don't think I am alone on this. In fact, being a rather black-or-white person, I tend to see myself as either living right or failing. And, in an absolute sense, that's true. But the gospel allows me to live a bit more in the gray - I have been forgiven, justified, and set upon a course of steady growth (of God's doing) called sanctification. I am not, praise God, what I once was. And I am not yet what I will be one day. I am somewhere in the gray zone between those two points. But for a long time, I oscillated between legalism (my "preferred" option) and saying it just doesn't matter how one lives - it's all by grace. Neither option was satisfying, but I saw no other option.

As my world regains "shades of gray" (not talking situational ethics, but rather transformation from the dark of night to day), I am on the lookout for things to help me with such struggles. One resource I found today is at http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/AskPastorJohn/ByTopic/51/2916_Should_we_teach_that_good_works_come_with_saving_faith/

Here, Dr. Piper speaks of how many of us hear the gospel and hear that good works are an "inevitable" product of true faith, and conclude that it really is all about works after all.

I would add perhaps to it by saying that there are many of us, including some preachers, who deal with the same dilemma I found myself - am I "doing good" and therefore OK with God, or have I messed up again, throwing everything into question - including whether I am truly one of God's. Sometimes, I believe, we talk and think and act like God made it possible through Jesus to accept a "lower standard" of good works to make us right with Him. Now, we don't worry about the impossible things like complete purity of thought, motive, and deed - instead we institute new standards of our own making ... avoiding things like smoking, dancing, and playing cards, or doing things like attending every church function whenever the doors are open, ritual prayers, dressing a certain way, speaking in Christianese, and checking off our duties as we give, sing, and sit.

We are legalistic, just as much as those who claim to live up to the demands of the law. We're just "smart" legalists who recognize the futility of that and make up instead our own lists. But maybe we're worse off, for we "can" actually reach our made-up standards. What would it take to wake us up then?

Trust Jesus?

I was recently listening to someone speak who urged the listening audience to "Trust Jesus. Just Trust Him. Trust Him and He won't let you down." Now, all of that is true. People should trust Jesus and He will not let you down, but this was done in an evangelistic, or at least a potentially mixed audience, setting. I hate to say this, but it dawned on me that we have become slightly like used car salesman, politicians, and ad agencies.

Now, I don't want to be offensive. Consider, though, what it sounds like to someone who either doesn't know Jesus or has a negative impression of Him. You aren't explaining who He is, what He has done, why He is trustworthy, or even why we should care about trusting Him in the first place. You're trying to sell an unknown "product" to a world that doesn't know they need Him. It's one thing to do this in a Christianized society - though I wonder if we were really as thoroughly Christianized as some histories say - but it's another to do this when the average person has no experience learning about Jesus.

There is nothing magical about the words "trust" and "Jesus" - they may mean different things to different people, anyway. The words only communicate when people know what you mean by them. Now, I'm not getting postmodern - those words have real meanings, and they are not so malleable that they mean anything you want them to - but we need to have more than a missile oriented approach.

People need to know who Jesus is and why He came. If they don't see their need, Jesus is at best, a secondary life issue - and perhaps no better than other religious leaders. If they understand who God is and who they are, their need will, or at least should, become the most pressing issue in their life. If they understand their dire situation before a Holy God, only then will they see Jesus as the solution and treasure of their life.

Trust Jesus? Absolutely. But tell them what you mean by that. It's not a 10-second conversation, though, and you must genuinely care about the person in front of you ...

Capital letters ...

I just wanted to note here that I normally use capital letters for pronouns referring to any person of the Trinity. I do this somewhat out of respect, I guess (though I do not think God is disrespected by using lower case letters - they are only a language convention), but more so that it is clear when a pronoun refers to God. I have found some sentences from other works to be very confusing because there are so many "he"s and too many possible objects to refer to.

I'm not entirely consistent with it, but I try to be. And I just thought I'd let you know ...

Motivate by fear, guilt, or love?

As I was driving, I was thinking about some of the sermons I have heard recently that impacted me. Lately, I have been drawn to those that speak most directly of Christ (as opposed to mere moralism with a call to accept Christ tacked on) - elaborating on his Glory, expounding on his love for sinners, and explaining what he has done for us. It has become such an astounding source of comfort and motivation that I have come to dislike teaching that centers only on fear or guilt. This may be a phase in my growth as a Christian, I don't know, but it feels like a great shift to me.

I was a performance-oriented person - actually, I still am, but to a lesser degree - who felt the crushing weight of the law, of being sinful before a Holy God. There was certainly an element of fear in my first coming to Christ. Fear of what was waiting for me if I stood naked before a Holy God. There was also guilt - guilt over things I had done that could never really be put right, and guilt over things I should have done but didn't.

These things - fear and guilt - did motivate me. At first, to try to be better, and then to despair of my efforts. They were condemning and crushing. But then, at some of my lowest points came the realization of the truth that I did in fact believe Christ is who He said he was, and that I had no other hope but Him. But then, astonishingly, I found that he was not interested in a slave, but a son! He did not want to condemn me for my past, but bore the condemnation for it himself! There really was no more condemnation for those in Christ! To learn and to see how filthy I was, and yet how much greater His love - from what world does such love come from? Certainly not this one ...

Christ's love is so much more motivating than even the Holy Fear and Holy Guilt I felt. Fear and guilt were good for driving me to the cross, and they were somewhat effective in keeping me from great sin. But, they did little to motivate me to act sacrificially and they didn't help with those little pesky sins that dog us all. I would even go so far as to say that fear and guilt can make us conform, but only love empowers us to suffer for another. To choose to suffer unjustly for the sake of another is truly Christ-like, and utterly beyond the normal nature of man. To suffer unjustly for a long time, without complaining or boasting? That would be truly other-worldly.

Now, I don't want to suffer. I especially don't want to suffer in the way of watching loved ones suffer. I don't want to ever have anything catastrophic happen to my kids. Or my wife. God is sovereign, and he does sometimes call his people to suffer that way, and, in that, I fear. I know intellectually that His will is always best, and that nothing better could happen than his plan. But I shudder at the thoughts I have like this ...

If God should call me to suffer like this - and I pray wholeheartedly that He does not - the only thing that will get me through this is His love. It won't be fear of Him, as irreverent as that sounds, and it won't be guilt - like knowing I shouldn't feel such things. Those motivations would fall to the ground, I suspect, like a broken piece of costume jewelry - fancy-looking, but relatively worthless. It is only His love that could sustain me through such a time.

And if it is only love that could get me through such a time, it is only love that can truly motivate on an every-day basis. It is only understanding His Glory and His Joy from with His love that can sustain me day to day. I think that's why Christian fads appear. We all know we need something to sustain us. Some believe it's excitement. Some novelty. Some discipline. And some just resign themselves that life must go from extreme highs to extreme lows. But I wonder ... what if people were given a steady diet of the Glory of God and His love for them? The denial of ourselves, and the complete embracing of Him. What if ...

1 John 3:1a

"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!"

Today I was with a group of people discussing this section of scripture. I encouraged them to slow down and consider each phrase, even every word, in this section. We often speed right by such precious words without a second thought.

To think that God lavishes his love on us - how many of us would use that word to describe how we think God acts towards us? I know that I would not have naturally chosen such a word - not that I thought that God was stingy with his love, but perhaps it is best captured by being "appropriate" in His love. I could see perhaps how God could love us the way we all love those distant relatives who are obnoxious and self-centered, yet still part of the family. Or perhaps that God would love us, but not want to "spoil" us or go overboard in his public display of affection. But instead, John tells us that God lavishes his love on us - he pours it out overflowing, uninhibited, and unashamed. Someone brought up the illustration they read about the frosting on a cake - most of us would put a moderate amount, maybe more than is absolutely necessary to cover the surface, but still a "reasonable" amount. But to "lavish" icing is to take multiple containers and just put it on as thick as you can, with no regard to cost, "normal cakes," or the mess it makes. To think that we are like the cake sitting there with God pouring out his love upon us is truly beyond explanation. None of us deserve it, and none of us can reciprocate it.

For God to do such a thing for me - a great sinner, blind to my own need, dead in ability to desire God, and deserving only of punishment - well, who can reject such love? Especially when your rejection of it does not lessen it. Instead, God loves you so much as to change you from the inside, to change your desires, to change who you are so that you do see, dimly perhaps, but seeing Him nonetheless as desirable.

What does this great love do for us? Nothing less than change our identity. No longer are we Americans or Germans, or Ethiopians, or computer programmers, or teachers, or sinners, or thieves, or liars - no, instead we are "children of God!" This is not the abused phrase that people sometimes use in reference to humanity in general, but of something far more personal. We now become adopted into God's family! He becomes our identity, our defining point. No longer are we those other things we use to designate ourselves - we are children of God, co-heirs with Christ, one day to be made like Him when we see Him. Everything else becomes something secondary - I am no longer an American, but a "little Christ" who happens to live in America. I am no longer a liar, but a "Christian" who sometimes stumbles into lying. I am no longer a teacher, but a Child of God skillfully disguised as one who teaches. I am His.

Who am I to be called a child of God? No one. Less than no one - I should be called an enemy of God. But God has lavished his love upon me and so I am now His child. Nothing can change that. And my dad isn't finished with me, but knows the plans he has for me. One day, though, I'll be like Him.

Time slips by ...

Wow, it's been almost two weeks since I last posted. I knew I did not post last week, as I was in California for a wedding ... Life continues to dissipate as a vapor ...

How do we mark time i such a way that we are more conscious of its passing? The sun rises and sets on one day so fast - how can we make ourselves realize the preciousness of these days without becoming obsessed or depressed with their passing? How do we number our days?

I am approaching middle age ... well, perhaps I am middle age, but close enough to its beginning that I can deny it a bit in my mind ... or maybe I'm still considered youth by others ... I don't know.

I do not know the day of my death, but I know who does. It could be today, tomorrow or 50 years from now. Worrying about it can not extend my life by a single minute, though I want to live long ... If I live to be 75, I will have lived 27,375 days - over half of which have already passed. 27 thousand days seems like a lot -enough in fact, to waste a few with little consequence. Yet 27 thousand dollars is not a ton of money today, and 27 thousand fans at a baseball game is not near capacity for most major league stadiums. 27 thousand grains of sand is probably much less than a bucketful, and 27 thousand seconds is 7.6 hours. Twenty-seven thousand days is not much time - especially when compared to eternity. In fact, compared to eternity, 27 thousand is less than the equivalent of one grain of sand to all the beaches in all the world. But during that grain of time, relationships are made, character is developed, and a destiny is reaped.

So, though two weeks slipped by like bathwater down a drain, important things happened. I went to California and interacted with family at a wedding, worshipped the Lord at a Church in Los Angeles, read books, enjoyed some attractions, and invested my time in my immediate family. I did not make the time to post, though much happened that caused me to reflect. The Lord is good to bring things in my life that cause me to see where my allegiances lie in "the moments" of life. There were times of joy, times of satisfaction, times when the opinions of others were to influential, and times when my desires ruled.

How much I need a savior to save me from myself - and to enlarge my life beyond the boundaries of "me!" My life is not bound to those 27,375 days (or whatever it actually turns out to be), but instead bound to the eternal God and Father through Christ, who gives meaning far beyond these years on earth. I am not what I do, I am not what I don't do - I am defined by my relationship to God. I am a "little Christ" by His grace - a fellow partaker of His nature, an adopted son, a member of His family. Time slips by - but I am in His hand ...

Why it is good to see the depth of our sin ...

The questions we ponder are vital because they represent where "the rubber meets the road" in our life. Good theology is essential, but unless you begin to process it and reflect on it, it adds little value to your life. I have been "chewing the cud" on the uglyness of my sin and the glory of our Savior and wanted to say a couple of things, primarily from my experience and the path God has brought me on thus far. So, here goes ....

It is good to focus on our sin

• because we think more highly of ourselves than we ought
• because we don't understand the depth of our need of Christ
• because we tend to reduce our concept of sin to things we personally don't struggle with but see other do
• because we tend to trivialize sin to just the big, obvious sins of adultery, murder (abortion), or violence
• because we tend as a larger community to make up our own standards of sin - smoking, drinking, dancing, length of hair, wearing anything but a suit to church, having our kids in public school, no facial hair, not hunting animals, or failing to "do church" the way we prefer - that have little or nothing to do with the life God to which calls his people
• because we often become complacent in our "goodness" and slip into self-righteousness, looking down upon others
• because we need to know how hard the struggle against sin really is if we are going to help another person grow in Christ to overcome their tenacious sin
• it tends to kill pride

It is good, when we see the depth of our sin, to focus on Christ

• because we see our utterly helpless condition and His great love for us
• because we see that this is not just actions that can be blindly reconditioned, but goes to the very core of our being in what we treasure, long for, desire, and believe
• because He is our only hope
• because we must despair of our ability to stand before God as a "basically good person" and throw ourselves completely on the grace of Christ freely offered
• because we must see ourselves as unprofitable servants of the Most High, dependent on Him for the smallest ability to help another
• because sins, whether "respectable" or "despicable" still deserve the wrath of God for eternity
• because we must learn to love one another through our sins, deferring to one another, putting aside preferences, and considering others more than we consider ourselves
• because we dare not reduce the gospel to mere respectable behavior, but know the depth and Glory of it so that our exuberance for it is not contrived, but flows out of a truly grateful heart
• because God calls us to wage war on sin, and we do not have the strength for the battle in ourselves - but Christ does, and He lives in us
• because humility, being poor in spirit, being crushed, being contrite, being repentant, and being meek are traits that God values in people he aids

When we see that sin is so wretched and dark, and we see that it is in us, we long for the light freely given. When we understand the truth about ourselves, and then understand what God has done for us, there is no other response that is appropriate but love, gratefulness, humility, thankfulness, joy, peace, and awe. We will want to be patient with others as we understand how the Lord is patient with us. We will want to be kind because he has been kind. We will want to be gentle because he has been gentle with us. We will grow in self-control as the Spirit grows us to see what He has done on our behalf.

In short, it seems that to fail to note the depth of our sin and our struggle with it - and the depth of Christ's love and His victory over sin and death and His provision for the struggle - leaves us with a stunted capability of love for the Lord. In Luke 7, we see Jesus being anointed by a "sinful woman." The parable he tells points to the fact that those who have a greater debt cancelled, love the person who forgave the debt more. It's not so much that the "sinful woman"s sins were so much worse than the pharisees or ours, but that she knew how sinful she was. The Pharisees thought they were basically good people, not in desperate need of help - so they loved Jesus little. This woman knew she had no hope but Christ's mercy, so when he freely forgave her, her response was one of deep, unashamed love. And that seems like such a great place to be that it is worth struggling with the depth of our sin and the filthiness of our "righteousness" before God.

It is not just looking into the deep, dark stench of a well that our sin is, but that from within the well, we see the gloriousness of the rescue of our souls by the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. The darker the darkness, the more stunning the light is in comparison.

Speaking Truth in Love

This is a thought I return to frequently ... in a way, it has become my favorite self-correcting phrase ...

Speaking truth in love. I have heard others speak on this concept, and I have pondered it many times. It helps me center myself when dealing with a difficult person and when I am dealing with someone I don't want to hurt.

Without truth, love becomes mere sentiment - a "go, I wish you well" outlook on the world that is not offensive, but has little real value. Love without truth becomes cruel, saying I care about you but I will not help you - because I want you to be "happy" being yourself. Frankly, I need help to keep me from becoming my own downfall. If you love me, you'll get involved in my life - especially when I am on a destructive path.

Without love, truth becomes callous and hardened, uncaring, and destructive - putting demands on us, but offering no help to us to meet those demands. Truth is like a reinforced concrete bunker, impervious even to the radiation of an atomic blast. It is real, but it offers nothing to those who fail ...

Ah, but truth in love ... that is balm to the soul, help to the weak, rest to the weary, and comfort to the afflicted. In some respects, not dissimilar to the structure of a human being. Truth is the hard reality that gives shape to our life, but it is not bare. It is instead surrounded by a layer of flesh, of warmth and softness and strength that cover the starkness of the truth into something more familiar, more attractive ... a person.

To speak truth in love seems to be the highest goal a human being has for his interactions with others. To speak truth into their life in such a way that they receive it, that they see its beauty, and that they see its value. To speak truth patiently, kindly, to look to the interest of others before your own, and to not have your own agenda is to love. To speak in such a way that truth is received and recognized for what it is, a precious gem or a light that guides your path for your benefit. This is what it means to speak the truth in love.

God himself has spoken. I believe He has spoken through His Word and through His Son. Jesus is the Truth. God is Love. What He does, he does for ultimate goodness. We don't have Jesus here before us today, and though God's invisible qualities are apparent in creation, they don't give us enough. We need to see, in our mind's eye, Jesus as the embodiment of Love and Truth, sent from the Father to us. We can look to others as living embodiments of His image, but that image is marred, impure, and dim. We see Him through faith, to be sure, but not just faith in faith, or faith for its own sake or faith in fables or cunningly devised tales. Instead we see Jesus as He is by God's Word. If God Himself does not tell us what He is like, we are lost. If God Himself did not preserve the record of his coming, we would have clue. We are at His Mercy - to have patience with us, to have pity on us, to condescend to come down to us. We need his benevolence to take the next breath.

Truth in love. Christ is the model. He did not compromise truth, yet spoke appropriately to people to give them what they needed, in order to accomplish His purposes in the moment. He drew people to himself, though he often offended some. He attracted the weak, the suffering, and the powerless, yet did not spurn the strong, the proud, and the powerful. He confronted all of them on occasions with their sin and their need for Him.

He was not interested in a show, nor did he try to accumulate political power. He called the greatest in His Kingdom to serve others. He turned the world's values upside-down. He did not compromise himself, yet he did not bow to political correctness. He honored God above men, yet did not needlessly offend. He piqued the interest of Roman officials and of prostitutes. He spoke to people and they immediately left home and livelihood to follow Him. He is not safe, but He is good.

Truth in Love. Truth and Love in action. Two legs of a runner spreading the Good News to the ends of the Earth ...

Living life in the "already - not yet"

Yesterday, I found myself in a discussion about change in our lives - both before and after we become a Christian. It's something that for whatever reason, is hard for us to figure out. We spend much time outwardly conforming to the external standards and demands placed upon us, without inner change taking place. One example is the wearing of suits. I find little basis for judging someone's spirituality or even professionalism on whether they wear a suit or not. I know some fine people who wear suits, and some people who wear suits who I wouldn't trust with a quarter. I know some people who are skilled - both with people and their area of expertise - who wear shorts and t-shirts everywhere. There does not seem to be a correlation of skill or "spirituality" with the clothes one wears. Personally, I am much more comfortable in jeans or shorts and I wear them whenever I can. But, I have had some people come up to me and let me know that they do consider dress a mark of spirituality and professionalism. I've tried to persuade a couple of people otherwise, but they get offended. At the same time, I don't want to unnecessarily offend others, so it is just easier for me at times to wear the suit ... but sometimes I feel like we have elevated the "whitewashed tombs full of dead men's bones" to be a social virtue. I'm more interested to know what is in someone's heart than what they wear ...

In a similar way, there is change that is purely external. It's the type of change that often comes from fear or powerlessness. If someone has the ability to make your life unpleasant, you will probably find a way to modify your behavior in order to avoid suffering. But it doesn't really change you on the inside. You have found a way to conform and avoid attention, but inwardly you know that your desire is to do otherwise. This inward change is something that rarely happens - and to have your desires line up with Christ's? That's truly a supernatural change. People who have not recognized Christ as Lord of the universe have some other person or idea as the defining influence in their life - and it's usually self. We live for our own agenda, for our own pleasure, for our own values, and for our own preservation.

When someone begins to trust Christ alone for their life, a change begins to occur at the deepest level - no more do we see self on the throne as the ultimate experience. When we are brought to life by Christ, we believe and are justified. We are declared "righteous" in the heavenly court because of the grand exchange. Our sin is given to Christ, who bears the punishment for them. And His righteousness is given to us - all the goodness of Christ is credited to our legal account. Because of this, we are accepted and adopted in God's family instead of being condemned as the rebellious enemies of God that we are. So, legally, our status has permanently changed. We are adopted sons and daughters of the Most High. We have been given every heavenly blessing in Christ and we are seated "in the heavenlies" with Him. We are fully forgiven and there is therefore now no condemnation for those in Christ!

And yet ... we still sin. Not just in the things we do. Not just by not doing the things we should. But in our very attitudes, desires, and thoughts. The inner life that often - but not always - works its way out to our actions. So if we are a new creature in Christ, capable of great change through the Spirit, why do we still struggle? Because we are still not yet what we will be. One day, those who have been justified (declared righteous) - those who in the power of the Spirit have grown in Christ-likeness (progressive sanctification) - when we see Him, we will be like Him. However God chooses to consummate our sanctification and glorification, we will be like Christ! It is a guaranteed conclusion because of what Christ has done. His final victory in us has been purchased, guaranteed, and won.

So, we are already part of His family, already seated in the heavenly places, already made perfect in Christ - but we are not yet there, not yet what we will be, and not yet free from the effects of sin. We are already all of those things promised to us, but we have not yet been given the full extent of the gift.

Thu, we have the ability to grow, the need to grow, the desire to grow, and the guarantee that we will grow - never fully reaching perfection this side of the grave. One day, though, we will be like Christ...